Start a business selling faulty rpg items. Such as brass knuckles that do 1d6 lightning damage but due to conduction you also take damage.
A flail made from aloe leaves so it healed as it dealt damage.
A ring of frostbite. Over time your hand slowly gets more and more frostbitten.
An enchanted scythe. Once in battle, it becomes painfully obvious the “enchantment” was Minor Illusion. It’s actually made of cardboard.
An axe that doesn’t do damage but makes enemies smell nice.
A bow that only shoots where you’re aiming if you’re blackout drunk.
A sword that does untyped area of effect damage. With d12s. Many of them.
A sword that is actually just a really big butter knife.
I’m saving all of these as ideas for cursed items.
a pair of boots that make any surface you walk on feel like slippery ice
a hammer that always looses it’s head and ends up hitting the nearest party member
The last one would be useful if you had a party of two people and one was lost. You go to hammer something and the head flies through miles of dungeons to wang your friend as you chase it.
Necklace of fire breathing, but it summons a fire elemental that follows you and breathes down your neck.
Real shit, this post is why my games have a goblin who’s a traveling salesmen. His name is Five, it’s short for Five Finger Discount. He’ll steal from you if you’re not careful.
That’s heckin cool!
Aldjskfjalsjsdjjkk 20K NOTES AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
I shall do something for this momentous occasion. Y’all will just have to wait and see what it is though.
Hauntedlattesbackup 