-once woke me up by kicking my bed really hard until i looked at him and then locked eyes with me, drank an entire cup of coffee without breaking eye contact, and then silently left the room
-wordlessly stuck a picture of justin trudeau on my wall, left if there for three months, and then took it down without explaining himself
-walked into the house and said “is it gonna look funny?” and when i said “what?” he shook his finger at me and walked away
-once before bed came into my room and kissed my forehead, said “no homo,” and left
-once came into my room while brushing his teeth, stared at me for five minutes, gave me a thumbs up and left
-once got upset that there was no bench in a forever 21, said “they’re trying to punish us. for being hetero, probably.”
-almost fell out of a hammock while i was typing this
i went into the kitchen and my dad was eating crackers and he said “theres nothing to see here.”
Why would anyone pick a human race in a fantasy game
I want a fantasy game where human isn’t even an option
Nah man, humans are the coolest
It’s one thing to fight demons if you’re from a species that lives for hundreds of years, is tied to natural magic, and births the best archers on the planet. It’s another thing entirely to do the same when your species is known to be slightly-above-average at farming.
“im regular jeff and im gonna behead tiamat and die trying”
i’m back at my ancestral home (lowe’s) and I just watched a very burly man in a lot of flannel carry a potted orchid SO TENDERLY across the parking lot
A sentence that starts with “i’m back at my ancestral home (lowe’s)” has to work really hard to make the end of that sentence equally as amazing and by god you’ve done it
Hauntedlattesbackup 